Mum Encouragement

Today I read a blog that made me stop and think about what is important. It is by one of my favourite authors Sally Clarkson. It is called 'Today, I will take time to...'

Here is Sally's list - I want it to be my list too!

• I would stop in the midst of my chores to listen to a boy-joke being shared and I would laugh out-loud and tell them they were so much fun.
• I would stop unloading the groceries when my husband is talking to me and look deeply into his eyes and listen to what he is saying, communicating with my whole self, “You are such a treasure to me. I want to know what you are thinking and feeling and dreaming.”
• I would take the moment to tossle a head as I am passing through a room and say, “I am so blessed to have you as my very own child. You make me so happy, just being you.”
• I would stop what I am doing, to go outside to look at a “treasure” when I hear, “Hey, Mama, come look!”–an apple blossom blooming on our very first apple tree or a worm on the grass or whatever had capture their curiosity.
• I would camp more outside on our deck and cuddle up under the sleeping bags more often to marvel at the stars and the one who made them.
• I would open my eyes to take a snapshot of today–just as it is–with boy noises, loud discussions, toys being played with intently, piano being practiced, thoughts being shared, messes coming and going..
• Instead of giving advice when a child is opening their heart through tears, I would listen with a sorrowful, sympathetic heart and take seriously what they were feeling, instead of mentally planning that the clothes in the dryer need to be folded.
• I would laugh more, worry less, lecture only on rare occasions, overlook messes instead of wasting my time being neurotic, notice the fingerprints of my maker in the moments of my days, and cherish those few years when we were all home, together, being the Clarksons and celebrating life.

Wow - doesn't that make you see what really matters in life. Our kids grow up so quick and yet as we are in the moment it seems like it will last forever. But it won't. So I am going to try and stop and remember what is important each day.

Apples

I have been reading a book about parenting and this quote really hit home.

"Don't judge October apples in June"

Well doesn't that remind me to be patient and to keep on keeping on!! Constantly going over things that I thought we had already covered and learned. We will get there and there is growth each day - even just a little bit that we can't always see.

My Motherhood Mission #1

I spent a day with a friend yesterday and we spent maybe 80% of our time talking about mum stuff, parenting resources and how we do different things with our kids. It made me start thinking about how we, as mums, talk about our role so much and if there should be more to our conversations. Then I thought - motherhood is my profession. It is what I do for a job/career. If I was working out in the 'real' world, as it is known, I would be talking to others in my field about what I was doing and what resources I used and found helpful etc - we call that networking. So why is it weird to do that as a mum. It isn't, or maybe it shouldn't be.

I love that in our family we have chosen for me to be a full time carer for our children. Being with my kids makes me happy. Not that loving it makes it easy but I still love it. As I continue in my job, I spend time on professional development - reading parenting books, gathering resources etc. And as a result I have different focuses along the way. So I've decided that I am going to share what my focus is in my motherhood mission.

At the moment I am reading (or I should say rereading) a book by Sally Clarkson, The Mission of Motherhood. I love this book. It encourages me in my daily activities with my kids and what I can teach them along the way. But more so, what I can learn with them. Here is the section that really touched me recently.

"I have often met well-intentioned parents who think they must be harsh and demanding to their young children in order to secure their obedience and good behaviour and to build their characters. Too often, I'm afraid, they fall into the trap of simply lording it over their children rather than truly reaching their hearts.

I'm not saying that obedience and behaviour and character aren't important. In fact, I think that teaching our children these qualities is essential. I believe, however, that Jesus showed us plainly the most effective way to do this: by modeling obedience and right behaviour and good character. And this requires us to do what Jesus did for his disciples - to lead our children not by telling them what to do, but by showing them.

When we chose to graciously overlook our children's messes and accidents, we are teaching them to be patient and forgiving with the mistakes of others. When we react sensitively, thoughfully and patiently to them, we are helping to instill these quality in their lives. As they benefit from our unconditional love, they learn to extend it to others as well."

How is that for a challenge?? But it has helped me so much to respond calmly when my three year old makes choices that aren't good - again! Or my one year old squeals to get his way. I might not be calm on the inside but with practice I am able to be calm on the outside and I think with time, my inside might be able to reflect that calm outside too.

What are you working on??
Is there something you've read that has helped you in your parenting journey?